Drummer Hoff

I'm going to try and drum up some enthusiasm for this lackluster effort.                     

*No one can argue with the "make peace, not war" message that becomes clear on the last page 
*The first time you read it you will probably get excited as the cannon is assembled, wondering what will happen
*Teaches your kids (and any parent who did not grow up in a military family) increasing ranks of officers, from corporal to general     

*Barbara Emberley literally takes the names of parts of a cannon and slaps them together with last names that rhyme with each respective piece -- that's the whole book  
*My son didn't let me get to the end either time we read it -- he was that bored (and trust me, it's not like there were a ton of other fun alternatives distracting him)
*Ed Emberley's artwork might have been the height of cool when this was published in 1967, but it reminds me of every crappy cartoon I used to watch growing up that somehow was still in syndication two decades after it originally aired

Another Caldecott winner that plays a sour note for me.  I know I march to the beat of my own drummer, but c'mon!  This award system is so fatally flawed that it should turn the cannon on itself and start from scratch.  Look, some of the roughly 75 medalists over the years truly deserve praise; but far too many of the Caldecott winners/honorees that have crossed my path are nowhere near the KBR definition of a Buy.  The way I see it, there's only one solution.  Going forward, I will promote myself to the title of Commander in Chief of Children's Books and award my own medals annually to the year's best books.  But I won't stop there.  I will also court martial any enemies of the state and put them in the literary equivalent of the brig.  Consider Drummer Hoff inmate #1...                    

Buy / Borrow / Donate / DESTROY

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